[ he runs his fingers through his hair a bit to fix whatever might have been put out of place from her (albeit gentle) hits, but he's not laughing. her question is a serious one, and it's something that he's been pondering since he came back. ]
I... wish I knew. [ from his expression, it's clear that thinking back on it has him feeling uneasy. ] It sounds strange, but I don't think I was in my right mind.
...That's not unbelievable. Others were acting strangely too.
[ She's not unreasonable, of course. Mikleo was suffering through some weird personality-alteration too, back then. Seeing him listless and convinced of his own worthlessness isn't something she's too keen to dwell on, but she has enough faith in his own strength to know that that's not the kind of person he is.
Same with Steven. Something funky was going on there. ]
Do you remember what kind of mind you were in, then?
With the type of situation we were put into, that's not surprising to hear.
[ still, it's relieving to hear that he wasn't the only one that was compelled to act in such an unorthodox way. ]
I don't recall much about my actions besides what became of them. [ ugh. ] Though what does stand out in my memories is some kind of need to... prove my strength.
[ "Humans", is what she wants to say, but Steven isn't like that normally. That's what she tells herself, in order to calm herself.
The silence that, in reality, spans only a few moments seems like it lasts an eternity in the wake of the tension that follows. Her grip on her umbrella handle is tight, but she gradually, very gradually, loosens it, and looks directly at him, letting out a long, audible sigh. ]
I know you're usually not that much of an utter moron, so I'm going to say this just once. If you ever get such a stupidly selfish and boneheaded idea in your head ever again, think as hard as you can about the ones you'd leave behind.
[ Caring is hard. The more she cares, the more she pretends not to. Her voice wobbles though, just a tiny bit (so she'd like to think), as this is a topic that hits way too close to home for her comfort. ]
...And how some people are tired of cleaning up after dead bodies. Bodies that belonged to people who also wanted to prove their strength.
I'd never do such a thing out of my own volition. I feel like I've made that clear.
[ just the thought of doing something so utterly reckless makes him want to bash his head against a wall. sure, he's had thoughts about trying to prove himself, but those were personal insecurities that he knows better than to act on. it wouldn't be rational.
but this isn't about him. not only has he inconvenienced edna, but something about the way she's speaking... it's as if she's trying to be brash, but the emotion is seeping through. he's observant enough to notice, and he lets out an audible sigh before he crouches down so that they're properly face to face. it doesn't seem proper to look down at her at a time like this. ]
But regardless... You have my word that I will. I won't allow this to happen again, no matter what.
[ he'll get stronger - mentally stronger. his insecurities can't be taken advantage of if they no longer exist. ]
[ despite the small smile playing on his lips, he honestly, truly doesn't. with a tongue as sharp as her's, he can tell that she has the force to back it up. ]
[ Good Steven. Bad Champion. Either way, she'll let that matter slide and try to...steer the conversation away from the fact that she was acting rather emotional (for her) a few moments ago. ]
Have you just been going around and groveling to everyone you know?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I... wish I knew. [ from his expression, it's clear that thinking back on it has him feeling uneasy. ] It sounds strange, but I don't think I was in my right mind.
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[ She's not unreasonable, of course. Mikleo was suffering through some weird personality-alteration too, back then. Seeing him listless and convinced of his own worthlessness isn't something she's too keen to dwell on, but she has enough faith in his own strength to know that that's not the kind of person he is.
Same with Steven. Something funky was going on there. ]
Do you remember what kind of mind you were in, then?
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[ still, it's relieving to hear that he wasn't the only one that was compelled to act in such an unorthodox way. ]
I don't recall much about my actions besides what became of them. [ ugh. ] Though what does stand out in my memories is some kind of need to... prove my strength.
[ and look how well that went. ]
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[ "Humans", is what she wants to say, but Steven isn't like that normally. That's what she tells herself, in order to calm herself.
The silence that, in reality, spans only a few moments seems like it lasts an eternity in the wake of the tension that follows. Her grip on her umbrella handle is tight, but she gradually, very gradually, loosens it, and looks directly at him, letting out a long, audible sigh. ]
I know you're usually not that much of an utter moron, so I'm going to say this just once. If you ever get such a stupidly selfish and boneheaded idea in your head ever again, think as hard as you can about the ones you'd leave behind.
[ Caring is hard. The more she cares, the more she pretends not to. Her voice wobbles though, just a tiny bit (so she'd like to think), as this is a topic that hits way too close to home for her comfort. ]
...And how some people are tired of cleaning up after dead bodies. Bodies that belonged to people who also wanted to prove their strength.
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[ just the thought of doing something so utterly reckless makes
him want to bash his head against a wall. sure, he's had thoughts about trying to prove himself, but those were personal insecurities that he knows better than to act on. it wouldn't be rational.
but this isn't about him. not only has he inconvenienced edna, but something about the way she's speaking... it's as if she's trying to be brash, but the emotion is seeping through. he's observant enough to notice, and he lets out an audible sigh before he crouches down so that they're properly face to face. it doesn't seem proper to look down at her at a time like this. ]
But regardless... You have my word that I will. I won't allow this to happen again, no matter what.
[ he'll get stronger - mentally stronger. his insecurities can't be taken advantage of if they no longer exist. ]
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[ A moment of silence is what it takes for her to calm down more after processing Steven's words. ]
Like I said, I know worse methods of punishment than mere parasol badonking.
[ And there she is back again, pulling herself together again to hide that crack in the rock solid wall. ]
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[ despite the small smile playing on his lips, he honestly, truly doesn't. with a tongue as sharp as her's, he can tell that she has the force to back it up. ]
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[ Good Steven. Bad Champion. Either way, she'll let that matter slide and try to...steer the conversation away from the fact that she was acting rather emotional (for her) a few moments ago. ]
Have you just been going around and groveling to everyone you know?
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[ way to kick a man when he's down, ed. ]
All of my Pokémon took refuge with different people in my absence, so I need to retrieve them. The least I can do is apologize for the inconvenience.